Sean Gardner probably shouldn’t be alive.
The 43-year-old Gold Coast man suffered horrific injuries in 2019 when he fell while waterskiing at 180 kilometres per hour in New Zealand’s Waikato River.
The impact was like hitting concrete, and his skull dislocated from his spine.
Sean suffered fractures to his spine and ribs, a collapsed lung and bleeding on the brain.
Thanks to a series of almost unbelievable coincidences, he survived.
But while Sean’s body has healed, his brain has not.
The former specialist welder is now among roughly 2 per cent of Australians living with a brain injury.
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‘Stay with me’
Sean can only recall snippets of the trip to compete in the Bridge to Bridge waterski competition in New Zealand.
When he woke up after the fall, he was face down in the water and unable to move.
“I remember seeing the glow of my wetsuit, the darkness underneath me and the light above me,” Sean said.
“I just thought, ‘This is what it feels like to drown’ … It was very peaceful.”
When he next opened his eyes, Sean was on a rescue boat, and a voice was repeating in his ear, “We’ve got you. Stay with me”.
Another blink, and he was in an ambulance with his wetsuit being cut off.
Sean doesn’t remember feeling pain or making the sounds that haunt his wife and friends.
“I remember being calm, but obviously I wasn’t on the outside,” he said.
“Everyone said it was the noises of a man just trying to survive.”
The trauma has left his wife, Fiona Daggot, with post-traumatic stress disorder and hazy memories of the ordeal.
The entire experience has haunted her, from the endless waiting and the relentless clock ticking as hours passed to the sickening suspense and the not knowing.
“I was pretty much in survival mode,” Fiona said.
She has since learnt that no one knew what to say back then when everyone thought her husband would die.
But after he woke from the coma and took his first step toward his wife with a gentle kiss, time stood still for Fiona.
“It wasn’t until after he had got into a ward that we found out about all of the amazing coincidences that allowed him to survive,” she said.
Keeping Sean alive
Sean’s odds for survival were slim, but thanks to some fortuitous factors, the emergency and specialist care he received gave him a fighting chance.
“It’s like everything that happened was just for me to survive,” he said.
When Sean was rescued from the water, he was retrieved without moving his neck.
Also, a highly experienced team of paramedics who were first to the scene had a combined 70 years of experience with trauma incidents.
The accident also happened near one of only three hospitals worldwide with a trauma unit that specialised in caring for patients without moving the body.
And finally, a prominent neurosurgeon was in town for a conference and was available to operate.
“They gave me a 5 per cent chance of surviving with no idea if I was going to have brain damage, or if I was going to walk or even talk ever again,” Sean said.
“I ended up walking out of the hospital 13 days later.”
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‘Life-changing’ support
Recovery has been physically and mentally brutal for the couple.
Sean’s brain injury affects his memory, mood and attention.
“It’s like you’re trying to spit something out and you can’t quite get it,” he said.
“Brain injury is the invisible disability because nobody can see it.
“If you saw me and spoke to me, you wouldn’t even know until you saw the big scar on the back of my head.”
It’s an issue Fiona initially struggled with as well.
“The hospital wasn’t doing anything [for the brain injury],” she said.
“They didn’t think it required any clinical intervention because nothing was showing up on their cognitive screenings.”
Fiona said brain injury symptoms could often be attributed to depression, pain or medication, and sometimes it felt like living with someone with dementia.
Marriage breakdowns not uncommon
Fiona contacted Synapse — a brain injury support service — to talk about her experience and frustrations.
Here Sean also found a community of other people living with a brain injury.
“It has been life-changing for both of us,” Fiona said.
“The physical therapy helped him walk, but this is the thing that probably helped our relationship the most.
“Having your life completely changed and the person you’re married to essentially become a different person — it’s really, really hard.
“But I guess I’m a different person too now.”
According to Synapse’s national director Adam Schickerling, the couple’s journey is not unique, with families often noticing the impacts of brain injury rather than a medical practitioner.
“It’s not until something goes drastically wrong that people reach out,” he said.
“Often one of the first things that happens is a breakdown of a marriage.”
Adam said the full extent of injuries could emerge years later, and long-term support was crucial.
Synapse is funded by state and federal governments and private donations.
Adam wants to secure ongoing funding to connect people living with brain injury and their families to support networks while in hospital.
‘Still striving’ to be better
While Sean has been told he will never race or work as a welder again, he has found a new direction in life.
He works as an NDIS support worker and looks forward to supporting others living with brain injuries.
“I feel like now I’ve gotten more meaning in life … now I feel more purpose in life. I want to help people,” Sean said.
“[My injury] isn’t ever going to go away, and coming to terms with that is really hard.
“It’s an injury where you have to take one day at a time.
“You’ve got to be patient with yourself, and you’ve got to realise that you’re going to have a lot of bad days, but there will be some great days and triumphs along the way as well.”
Sean has the coordinates of the location of his fateful fall tattooed on his arm.
“It was the place I got my second chance at life,” he said.
“I like to think of it like I did with my racing. I was always looking for that 1 per cent that would help me to be a better athlete.
“The difference is now I’m still striving for that 1 per cent — but as a better me.”
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