Crime Guy’s Lawyers Go To Justice Department To Say Hey, Don’t Charge Crime Guy With Crimes

A couple weeks ago, we all laughed and laughed at the dumbstupid letter Donald Trump’s lawyers sent to Attorney General Merrick Garland, respectfully begging for a meeting so they could explain that Special Counsel Jack Smith was a witch hunter doing witch hunts, and that Hunter Biden exists. It was widely interpreted as a sign that indictments were very soon coming in Smith’s BOXES HOAX, which is what Trump calls the investigation into why he stole all those classified state secrets and placed them inside his bottom so the FBI wouldn’t find them when they came calling.

It sounds like that meeting happened this morning, though apparently not with anybody as important as Garland. This was their meeting to explain that the Justice Department has it all wrong and Donald Trump is the purest of good men with only the best intentions, blah blah blah, innocent until suck my balls, or however it goes. Also CNN says they brought with them allegations of prosecutorial misconduct, so that’s amusing.

The Washington Post reports it was John Rowley and James Trusty, the two lawyers on that letter, plus Lindsey Halligan, another one of the idiots.


Trump himself is doing fine:

Here is the text of that “truth” from Trump’s Truth Social, in case a drag queen wants to read it at today’s Story Hour:

HOW CAN DOJ POSSIBLY CHARGE ME, WHO DID NOTHING WRONG, WHEN NO OTHER PRESIDENT’S WERE CHARGED, WHEN JOE BIDEN WON’T BE CHARGED FOR ANYTHING, INCLUDING THE FACT THAT HE HAS 1,850 BOXES, MUCH OF IT CLASSIFIED, AND SOME DATING BACK TO HIS SENATE DAY WHEN EVEN DEMOCRAT SENATORS ARE SHOCKED. ALSO, PRESIDENT CLINTON HAD DOCUMENTS, AND WON IN COURT. CROOKED HILLARY DELETED 33,000 EMAILS, MANY CLASSIFIED, AND WASN’T EVEN CLOSE TO BEING CHARGED! ONLY TRUMP – THE GREATEST WITCH HUNT OF ALL TIME!

INCLUDING THE FACT THAT HE HAS 1,850 BOXES, MUCH OF IT CLASSIFIED, AND SOME DATING BACK TO HIS SENATE DAY WHEN EVEN DEMOCRAT SENATORS ARE SHOCKED.

That’s our favorite part.

WHEN EVEN DEMOCRAT SENATORS ARE SHOCKED.

Trump was glad to hear the other day that Mike Pence would not be charged for the classified documents they found in his house, but demanded to know when he would be “fully exonerated” just like Pence was.

And then last night, it appears he was just hallucinating:

Reports are the Marxist Special Prosecutor, DOJ, & FBI, want to Indict me on the BOXES HOAX, despite all of the wrongdoing that they have done for SEVEN YEARS, including SPYING ON MY CAMPAIGN. Biden Crimes go unpunished, including that he had Boxes in Chinatown, in his garage by the “Corvette,” & 1,850 Boxes in Delaware that he won’t allow anyone to see. That is real OBSTRUCTION! They seek retribution for Republicans looking into Biden’s CRIMES! I HAVE DONE NOTHING WRONG. ELECTION INTERFERENCE!

Okeydoke.

So he’s freaking the fuck out.

Meanwhile, this week the grand jury in the case is back and hearing more evidence, reports NBC News. And the New York Times has a story about how former Trump lawyer Evan Corcoran apparently made a long and detailed recording last year of his thoughts, feelings, recollections, and reflections on an entire month of the case. Prosecutors have this tape now, and it sounds pretty juicy:

In complete sentences and a narrative tone that sounded as if it had been ripped from a novel, Mr. Corcoran recounted in detail a nearly monthlong period of the documents investigation, according to two people familiar with the matter.

Mr. Corcoran’s narration of his recollections covered his initial meeting with Mr. Trump in May last year to discuss a subpoena from the Justice Department seeking the return of all classified materials in the former president’s possession, the people said.

It also encompassed a search that Mr. Corcoran undertook last June in response to the subpoena for any relevant records being kept at Mar-a-Lago, Mr. Trump’s private club and residence in Florida. He carried out the search in preparation for a visit by prosecutors, who were on their way to enforce the subpoena and collect any sensitive material found remaining there.

Uh yeah, we guess that sounds like it might be helpful evidence. Remember, in March, both DC District Court Judge Beryl Howell and an appeals court panel ruled that attorney-client privilege didn’t apply with Corcoran because of the crime-fraud exception, because of a reasonable belief Trump had lied to him about the location of certain classified documents. So that’s why Jack Smith has that. Boxes hoax, election interference, etc., and so forth.

The Times says Trump aides are scared of this one. “The level of detail in the recording is said to have angered and unnerved close aides to Mr. Trump, who are worried it contains direct quotes from sensitive conversations.”

Guess they’ll just have to keep worrying.

Appeals Court Agrees That Trump Too Crimey-Fraudy To Assert Privilege Over Lawyer’s Testimony

In the meantime, some very smart legal experts have put together a 186-page Model Prosecution Memo over at Just Security, taking all the publicly available evidence in BOXES HOAX and analyzing which crimes Trump could and should be indicted for. And to be clear, they think he’s going to be:

This model prosecution memorandum assesses potential charges federal prosecutors may bring against former President Donald Trump. It focuses on those emanating from his handling of classified documents and other government records since leaving office on January 20, 2021. It includes crimes related to the removal and retention of national security information and obstruction of the investigation into his handling of these documents. The authors have decades of experience as federal prosecutors and defense lawyers, as well as other legal expertise. Based upon this experience and the analysis that follows, we conclude that Trump should–and likely will–be charged.

Lock him up where we never have to listen to his face again.

[New York Times / Just Security]

Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter right here.

Just got to BlueSky!

I have profiles those other places but I think I forgot how to log on.

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Joe Manchin: ‘The Most Popular Republican In The Senate’

Fresh from his high five-ing trip with Sen. Kyrsten Sinema to meet with their real constituents in Davos, Sen. Joe Manchin returned to the Sunday shows to assure all of us that HE is the one who will ruin the Democratic Party’s attempts to make a better tomorrow. So let’s check out Joe Manchin and his amazing terrible friends.

Let’s Negotiate With Economic Terrorists

Appearing on CNN’s “State Of The Union,” Manchin is asked about the White House request for a clean debt ceiling bill. Manchin, ever the helpful stooge, took the “we won’t negotiate with Republicans on the debt ceiling” out of context to talk about a need to negotiate in governing. This accidental or willful misunderstanding did not go unnoticed by the side of the aisle all too willing to remove context so they can extort cuts to programs that help people.


But just in case we thought Manchin is only misguided and truly is a part of the solution, the senator from West Virginia quickly disabused us of that notion. When Dana Bash asked if he would support Democratic Rep. Ruben Gallego’s Senate run in Arizona, Manchin made it clear that he would instead support his Senate partner-in-obstruction.

MANCHIN: […] I have been voting for 40 years fairly conservative all the way through, and I think people know I’m in the middle and a centrist. […] I would think that she needs to be supported again, yes, because she brings that independent spirit. […]

Two things:

1) If you have been doing something for 40 years (or as a senator for 12 years) and nothing has drastically improved in your state, you have failed miserably.

2) Contrarianism, in and of itself, is not independence. It’s as dangerous a thing as mistaking speaking without thought, for speaking the truth. Don’t you think?

Speaking of…

Here Comes the “Both Sides” Express!!

Manchin then moved over to NBC’s “Meet The Press” where he proceeded to say stupid things with zero pushback from host Chuck Todd. When commenting on the investigation regarding how Joe Biden handled classifed documents, Manchin expressed what he presumably considered profound insight instead of a lazy false equivalence.

MANCHIN: It’s just hard to believe that in the United States of America we have a former president and current president basically in the same situation.

No, Manchin, they are not in the same situation as it’s been made clear numerous times already.

Manchin is in such a bubble, he made the following statement without seemingly realizing how deluded it is.

Hahahahahahaha! Jesus, Manchin would get crushed in a Democratic (or Republican) primary well before a general election.

Even Rep. Nancy Mace of South Carolina, in the effort to compliment Manchin, basically narrows down why he’s never gonna be President. (Roll Credits)

Mace, herself also tried to “both sides” the classified documents drama, but her effort was so asinine it momentarily woke up the journalist trapped in Chuck Todd’s sunken place.

MACE: Well, I think that’s because there’s no – there’s very little information about Biden. I mean, these documents were hidden for five years. We have very little information, whereas with the former president, everybody knows that those documents existed. They knew where they were. They knew where they were located. […] There was information that was presented to the public about —

TODD: Let me stop you there. We didn’t know where they were located.

MACE: – the number of documents, for example.

TODD: They defied a subpoena, it took a search warrant.

MACE: Well, the FBI and the DOJ —

TODD: In fairness, they didn’t know.

Mace also tried to downplay the possibility of a government shutdown and an economic default if the debt ceiling isn’t raised.

MACE: […] But, you know, this happened under the previous administration. The government was shut down for 35 days. There was a stalemate. But people still got paid. Accounts still got filled up. And the sky didn’t fall. […]

Nothing too bad happened except a threatened downgrade on our credit and an increase in the debt. Totally great, Mace.

On CBS’s “Face The Nation,” Republican Rep. Mike Turner from Ohio tried to “both sides” an insurrection when asked why Republicans seated 19 election deniers on the Oversight Committee.

Remind us again, when was the Democratic insurrection? We must have memory-holed and lost all the footage of liberals marching through the Capitol with coexist flags and screaming in the Senate chambers in Kitara Ravache garb to make John Kerry president.

On ABC’s “This Week,” Republican Rep. Michael McCaul from Texas also tried to assure us like a common Susan Collins that Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene had learned her lesson and would grow into her office.

Who among us has not radically matured from a childlike 44-year-old to a fully grown 49-year-old adult?

But … But … Chicago!

Appearing on CNN’s “State Of The Union,” McCaul tried to downplay the need for gun reforms in the wake of another mass shooting by once again invoking Chicago gun violence. Thankfully, Bash pointed out the patchwork of gun laws in the US and that most of the guns in Chicago come from neighboring states with lax gun laws like Mike Pence’s Indiana.

Some dog whistles will never die.

Have a week.



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